virtual love.

how can i be falling for someone i've never met? how can i be falling for a face i've never seen, for hands i've never held, for lips i've never kissed, for eyes i've never gazed into to find a soul i've never known? how can i be falling for the silly conversations at 2 a.m. about a treehouse we'll never build, where we'll never live happily ever after away from all the other people in the world that we'll never know and never give ourselves the chance to know, where we'll never speak in languages that nobody else can understand, where we'll never raise little feral children who will never know how to speak proper english, where, even when the only life around us will be trees, we'll never have to be lonely again? how can my heart that i thought would never love again feel so full every time he tells me i'm so pretty and he can't wait to see me again and he jokingly asks me if i will marry him, even though i know that will never happen. it all started with sandwiches, and it was all downhill from there. an hour's drive could make him mine for at least one night, and at most for the rest of my days, but life has gotten in the way each and every night. my empty gas tank could also have something to do with it. patience hasn't been on my side so far, but i just keep waiting, waiting, waiting for sunday. waiting for my life to take some crazy turn. waiting for my heart to explode. waiting to see the face i've only seen in dreams and in 5-year-old pictures. i read poetry to pass the time. i take pictures to pass the time. i pluck my eyebrows, get on my hands and knees and scrub the floors, check my tires. i rearrange my closet so that all my clothes are in a rainbow pattern, except for orange. i hate orange. two days to go...